The boys and I have slowly returned to school and work, hoping to glean a bit of normalcy out of life as we know it now. Normal...what a foreign word to me. Nothing seems normal at all anymore. Even in the simple and mundane things, like going to the grocery store or helping one of the kids with his homework...there is no more normal. I don't find myself sobbing or weeping all day long anymore; those feelings have been replaced with a mind-altering numbness and an overwhelming sense of emptiness that nothing seems to fill.

I've signed us up for a grief support group that meets every other week. We begin on Thursday. The boys are also seeing their counselors at school on a regular basis, which is a blessing since I know each of these women very well and would trust my children with any of them and know they will truly listen to them.

I did break down and visit my physician's office last Friday to get some help with sleeping...it's still very difficult to fall asleep, and even more difficult to stay asleep longer than about 45 minutes at a time. Hopefully with her help I can get my sleep cycle more regulated and be worth a little more to my family and my employer.

Thanks to each of you for your kind regards, your private messages, and your prayers.