It's been four weeks today...in some ways I can't believe it's been that long, and in others it seems like an eternity. Time is so fluid and intangible...right now it's as if we are in a vacuum and everything is suspended in some strange continuum. The boys seem to be adjusting well; they play with their friends and do normal kid things without much thought. We went to the Jubilee (a fair/carnival thing) yesterday and had a good time, and the kids rode rides and played games and got to be "normal" for a while. The younger two ask questions occasionally, or mention things like, "I wish Daddy was here to do this," or "I miss Daddy." André talks to me a little bit about how he feels, which is good. He also talks to his friends, his uncle Jason, and his counselor. We all will go back to Journey of Hope (the grief support group) on Thursday, and I look forward to that. We went to church this morning, and I saw some friends of ours who miss Byron as much as we do. It's good to be around people who care.

I had a dream the other night that Byron called me on my cell phone. He used to call me about a dozen times a day, so that made sense to me. In the dream, he called and was talking to me about how he missed me and the boys, and how he is OK and loves us very much. He wanted to make sure we were all right and for us to know he was sorry he wasn't here. It was very comforting. I told my sister about the dream, and she had dreamed nearly the same thing. Isn't that neat? I think he was telling us that he is OK. Of course, I know he's OK because I know he is in heaven. He was right with God and had been for a long while. I think he's looking on us now, trying to help us through this as much as he can. I know we need him.